"...under the TX rule that "sometimes an asshole just needs killin'."
From the days when laws were simple, plain language. Before Lawyers.
Morning, Glories. 6:30 is a great time to get up. Fog hanging on the pastures. Sky is light and just as I walked outside to breathe it in, the first traces of coral-pink begin tinging sky and landscape. A fresh day.
I long for days I can feel this good by the end of them.
"a single pinning punning comeback"
d@mn you, Autoincorrect!
More insectuous than a butterfly collector's parlor.
-Famous Seamus
GROAN - time to quit lurking and go see what real life has to offer! Can't take the PUNisment anymore. Also, I can't think of a single pinning comeback using pin, thorax, antenna, monarch, zebra, anything! I tried! Must be the heat that I get flustered by.
__________________
Yes, I had to dangle a participle to do that. Sue me.
Convert special characters to HTML
http://www.unicodetools.com/unicode/convert-to-html.php
Works for cobs, too.
Comment faster! I'm caught up and it's only 9am here. Don't make me get up and live my miserable life. Comment faster!
Cat News
Old Jack has not fully recovered his appetite following his dental surgery. Hope it's just a slow recovery, but we think he should be doing better. Still weak; he tried to jump up on my desk a few minutes ago and didn't make the leap! He's a great old guy.
http://www.unicodetools.com/unicode/convert-to-html.php
D-Lamp: "I use that thing quite a bit when I attempt to copy and paste stuff here."
Were you ever going to tell us about it, or just keep the secret to yourself? Too late now. 
Once again, for those who missed it, this is better than the program I wrote:
Got 500 errors?
If you run into a 500 error because you cut&pastried unicode into Ace's totally-kewl retro museum-piece website, this webpage allows you to de-unicode text. Call it Moronizer. Works for cobs, too!
Convert special characters to HTML
http://www.unicodetools.com/unicode/convert-to-html.php
Morning, Glories.
Here at last. Suddenly wide awake at 4am, thought about getting up. Wondered if Vic was already at work. Argued with the Almighty a little. Finally passed out again after 5. Weird night. Made it a little harder to arise when daylight finally arrived.
_______________
reposting from the ONT:
Got 500 Errors?
Y'know my ASCII-izer program nobody tried? I was about to improve it when I found a website (NOT mine) which I recommend using instead.
If you run into a 500 error because you cut&pastried unicode into Ace's totally-kewl retro museum-piece website, this page allows you to de-unicode text. Call it Moronizer. Works for cobs, too!
(A big tip o' the webworker top to morning birthdays poster Gran ✞ who enlightened me that HTML &-codes DO work on AoSHQ. For some reason, I had thought they did not, else my original program would've been much better. But the web page is best anyway.)
Convert special characters to HTML
http://www.unicodetools.com/unicode/convert-to-html.php
____
Had to drop that first. Now to feed pesks, make coffee, and then back to read the thread.
Well, early ONT was fun. Wonder how many hundreds of comments there will be by morning!
A whlie back, Mom got a cough while visiting my sister, and decided she had cancer, so she quit smoking cold-turkey that moment.
I've been on the receiving end of that willpower. It's potent!
She started at seventeen and quit fifty years later. Just turned 92 and doing better than lots of folks my age (many of whom are already dead from "old age"!). Inspiring!
Says she still wants a cig, though. What a drug!
Good night, Gracies. Don't do anything you wouldn't want your angels to watch.
(saunters off, chuckling snarkily at that one)
Seamus: Great looking dog. D'aaaww.
____________
Ricardo Kill: "...at some point the far off look in their eyes as they just stared into the distance..."
I was dragged to a strip club once, utterly against my will, of course, but I did my best to "fit in." Didn't work. As a young lass was writhing in front of me, I noticed that, dangling from her G-string, was a $50 bill, and I made some remark of humorous acknowledgement. (It was not a noisy club at the time.)
Hearing my remark, the girl dropped completely out of character. "I know!" she laughed, and told us some story of the guy who'd dropped it on her. Not so much a buzz kill as a sexiness evaporation, as she was suddenly just standing there talking to us like my cousin.
I kinda liked it better.
Distant cousin, okay?
Anonymous: Bitter? Um, no; either I di'n't write goodly, or you misread me. The multiple appearances of a gag are all just an extra level of funny to me. I used to collect copies of daily comics when they'd hit the same joke on the same day, apparently without looking at each others' homework. :)
As Stilton said, it's just hitting on similar themes, and this is just hunting in the same pastures.
I should add, amateurs like me may luck out and bag an occasional quail. Stilton brings down the turkeys every day.
I know folks don't like hearing this, but...
Your particular public schoolhouse may seem great. Your particular child's teacher may be trying her best, despite the system. But, the System is the Enemy.
If you are sending your child to public schools, you are giving them to the enemy. It's child endangerment.
Even without the perv teachers & coaches.
"Oh, I just couldn't home-school because this, that, and t'other!" Well, you'd better figure something else out before they've utterly stolen your child's future.
That's all I've got to say about it.
Mike Hammer>> Mindful - Thanks! Sorry yours didn't work out, though
Oh, it worked. Just needed the translation table upgraded. But it was too large a program for what it did, it only worked for Windows & emulators presumably, and one had to manually install it. And I would have to maintain it. And the webpage it rode in on. And get sued when some leftard decides my program brought down their network.
So, I'm delighted someone has a webpage which anyone can easily access!
Got 500 Errors?
Y'know my ASCII-izer program nobody tried?
I was about to improve it when I found a website (NOT mine) which I recommend using instead.
If you run into a 500 error because you cut&pastried unicode into Ace's totally-kewl retro museum-piece website, this page allows you to de-unicode text. Call it Moronizer. Works for cobs, too!
(A big tip o' the webworker top to morning birthdays poster Gran ✞ who enlightened me that HTML &-codes DO work on AoSHQ. For some reason, I had thought they did not, else my original program would've been much better. Forehead slap.)
Convert special characters to HTML
http://www.unicodetools.com/unicode/convert-to-html.php
Pardon this test on a stale thread.
‘They didn’t get much pickup,’ the retired lieutenant colonel said of the ‘instigators’
If the above paragraph looks okay, then I can recommend using this website to prepare text for AoSHQ's broken software.
What's this? An ONT that isn't posted at my beddy-bye time? I might actually get to read/followlink the whole thing without passing out. How exciting!
Sir Mætenloch - thanks, as ever.
Laurie David's Cervix >> Beware of Arizona "solid conservatives".
You have nothing to fear from Arizona's solid conservatives like us!
I once did a cartoon involving "Rock, Scissors, Paper," before the invention of Scissors & Paper. Since then, I've seen a similar cartoon twice, and corresponded with one of the two other cartoonists. They weren't rip-offs. And that's not even "Great minds think alike." More like "Desperate for dailies hit on similar obvious gags."
And so it is with "Is Is." I'm tracking this one.
I'll give Mrs Jarlsberg points for best original-context use so far. (Hat tip to her. My own Mrs has provided me some great punch lines, too.)
But an Aug 24 headline on American Thinker beat you by a day. (But that one hardly counts, because the usage was divorced from the phrase's Clintonian ancestry - and the article itself.)
However (puffs out chest), I commented on Ace of Spades Aug 23, 7:48am, and repeated the joke at 8:53am:
Barry the O: It depends on what the meaning of IS is.
_______
C'mon, I've had that in my head for DAYS, and I finally find a place to hang it and nobody notices. I would haz a sad if I cared.
Maybe nobody got it. Let me explain. See, ...
Commenter Lou Grant was the only response I got, after the 2nd time:
"MWW that Is Is thing is pretty good. I'm I'm surprised it it has not not come up sooner."
Just keeping track to see if I reallllly got first use on it. I'll bet, somewhere on the web, there's someone who beat you, AT, and me to it.
WNU Editor, I follow almost every post, when I can keep up, which I can't always. Try to credit you whenever I link to some article you led to. Kudos & much appreciation for your amazing and valuable work.
However, I'm sure I'm not the first to note that you seem to have no idea what apostrophes are for.
I can understand, English native language not yours being, contractions and possessives, especially with pronouns, can be easy to confuse, sometimes even for those of us who grew up back when 5th-grade American English teachers insisted students actually know English.
So one might almost forgive the fingernails on the blackboard of this common error:
"As Arab States Step Up To Assist Libya In It's War"
However, this:
"Iran Show's Off The Israeli Drone..."
is so egregiously awful my inner Grammar Nanny screams to the fore. Neither possessive nor contraction, nor pronounish. No excuse!
L'arn y'all some flukin' English, ya durn Rooskie.
Okay, I think my inner nag is satisfied. Carry on.
