In military news from the near future

In military news from the near future:

The USS Vagina Monologues is hosting a get-together on-board to welcome a contingent of oppressed Chinese homosexuals. Watercress sandwiches and pink champagne will be served.

"It's all part of the military's new commission to 'reach out to all the world's oppressed people unless they're straight, white, or Christian," said Rear Admiral Paisley Rainbows.