Big Whoops Cascade

Pregnant mother-of-three FIRED from Popeyes because she couldn't afford to pay back the $400 stolen during her shift by an armed gunman …

…Two years ago in a less turbulent time, Mike Premeau and Kathy Danke launched a small business, Memories Gourmet Pizza Co., in their Wisconsin town. … The two were successful… They grew a base of loyal customers. … But all that was threatened this week when people began mistaking them for Memories Pizza of Walkerton, Indiana…

[I'm only halfway through reading the list, but there's so many great ones, I rush to post this. Here's a great one, considering today's "outrage industry":]

#42: Viewers Take Offense
In early 1960, a TV viewer complained to a network about seeing a black man kiss a white woman on one of their shows. The network, eager not to offend, flew an account executive down to meet with the viewer and explain to him that the actor was actually white, but that the local station had accidentally broadcast the show at a high contrast ratio, making him appear dark-skinned. When Paul Krassner (editor of the satirical underground magazine The Realist) heard about this he was outraged that a TV network would be so afraid of offending a racist. So he designed a prank to serve as payback. He asked his readers to write to the network after the April 1st airing of the celebrity panel show Masquerade Party (a completely unexceptionable show), and to complain that they had been offended by something on it, but not to specify what it was that had offended them. Hundreds of his readers obliged. The result was panic at the network. Reportedly the TV executives watched the tape of the show repeatedly, desperately trying to figure out what could have offended so many people.

"Officer Stanley Wychock advised Franklin that he was under arrest… Franklin allegedly jumped to the ground and started rolling in dog feces. He then allegedly stated that officers could not arrest him because he is 'covered in $#!+…'"

[Alcohol was involved. The things our peace officers have to face!]

Sondra Andrews’ son, 2nd Lt. Darryn Andrews, is one of six soldiers killed reportedly while searching for Sgt. Bowe Bergdahl.

The sergeant’s return from captivity has stirred “very raw emotions.”

“It gets really hurtful when I think, this guy was worth my son’s life? My son who was patriotic? Who was a true soldier? Who defended his country with his life?” Andrews told Army Times via phone on Monday. “That guy was worth that? I don’t think so.”

Andrews also was upset to hear the U.S. government agreed to release five prisoners from Guantanamo Bay in exchange for Bergdahl’s freedom.

“I bet you anything there were soldiers killed or wounded capturing those five guys,” she said. “So what does that do for their sacrifice? They sacrificed for nothing, because they turned right around and let them go.”

… she wants people to know her son was a good man and a good leader who always wanted to join the Army. Darryn Andrew’s son was just 2 years old when his father was killed. His daughter was born four months later.

“He was a wonderful father and family man, an amazing son, a great brother,”

Taliban 'was thrilled' when deserter Sgt Bergdahl's father thanked 'Allah the merciful' in his White House press conference… "This is incredible, he's gone way way beyond just a father reaching out to his son. He’s actually putting so many lives in danger, and he’s giving a propaganda tool to Mullah Omar, who is the leader of the Taliban who the U.S. has been looking for for years."

Taliban Commander Says More Kidnappings to Come After Bergdahl Deal

...The cans of rotten Baltic herring, which had already expanded due to the powerful fermentation gases inside, were heated by the fire and began to explode over a period of six hours. One of the cans flew over an outhouse roof, while another shot over the bay to a neighbour's house....

Several major airlines have banned the fish, arguing they are pressurised goods and must be classified as potentially explosive.

The delicacy is so foul-smelling that it is often eaten outside.

The federal probe that resulted last night in the arrest of five purported anarchists for allegedly plotting to bomb an Ohio bridge began last year at an Occupy Wall Street rally in Cleveland that was infiltrated by an informant who was directed to attend the event by his FBI handlers. ... Defendant Brandon Baxter... “suggested getting tacks that they could throw out of the back of the car if they get in a chase.” This getaway tactic was last successfully used in a Batman episode from 1967.

The operator told Reat to return to the scene of the incident. Reat at first refused and argued with the operator but relented after the operator threatened to not send police if he didn't go back. Reat went back to the scene to wait on police, where he was shot and killed by the occupants of the Jeep.

The man, wearing a suit, collared shirt and a tie, climbed on top of the counter at the Family Dollar ... When he realized it was empty, he grabbed some pennies off the counter and took off. The theft was captured on surveillance video.

told the officer she had been using methamphetamine and had last used it four days prior. She, however, claimed the meth lab was not hers and that she was only transporting it to a friend's house. [What friend? Who? Uh, no, I didn't mean a friend. I meant... uh.. I found it, yeah.. that's it....]

I just wanted to highlight the detail that was the most fun for me: the guy went into a gun store, and started talking about explosives. ... "(We) felt uncomfortable with his overall demeanor and the fact he didn't know what the hell he was buying," Ebert said. "I thought it prudent to contact the local authorities, which I did."